Jamie's World Today

MY STORY

2009-06-18T19:47:00.003-05:00

November of 2004 is when I first remember a sore spot on the side of my tongue. Like everyone else who gets a "lie bump" on their tongue, I thought nothing of it.
Weeks went by and it didn't go away. I swished baking soda and water, I tried peroxide, but Chloraseptic was the only thing that temporarily helped.
I was conscious of this sore spot 24/7. Especially when I kept uncontrollable biting my tongue. Even in my sleep, I would wake myself from biting my tongue. Of course, that only aggravated it more.
I eventually saw a doctor to see if he could help. He was not real concerned and prescribed an antibiotic, which did not help. He then referred me to an ENT who also was not real concerned and prescribed me something else. I went to him several times but none of the medications worked.
He finally suggested a punch biopsy of something he felt under my tongue. That was really a last resort and he didn't expect it to be anything serious due to my age (35), being a nonsmoker and nondrinker.
Several days later I received a call on my cell phone in Walmart parking lot. It was the doctor. I instantly knew something was wrong by him calling me personally. He asked if I could come to his office right away because he needed to talk to me. I told him no, that I wanted to know right now.
The next words he said to me are still like a horrible dream, "you have tongue cancer". He was as shocked as I was.
What ?? Why?? How?? Nothing in my life prepared me for those words. I had been devasted by loved ones receiving that diagnosis, but until someone says "YOU have cancer" you can not understand the fear you feel.
I am married with two sons who were then 2 and 4 years old. They are my life and I am their lives. What would they do without me?
I finally got an appointment with a wonderful surgeon at Vanderbilt 3 weeks later. Those were the longest 3 weeks of my life! It turned out that the spot on the side of my tongue was not the cancer. The cancer was underneath the back left side of my tongue. As this tumor had been growing, it was pushing my tongue up and into my teeth. The sore spot was where it was rubbing my teeth. As it pushed up, my tongue wasn't fitting in my mouth properly which caused all the biting.
My surgeon was so positive from the moment I saw him. He always made me feel that I could get through this situation, though it would be such a long road. And it was.
2005 was an eventful year. Diagnosis March 10, surgery April 7, home from the hospital April 12, 35 radiations and 8 chemos started in June and lasted all summer. I worked throughout this time almost everyday. I would work until noon then spend all afternoon at treatments.
The 6 hour surgery removed the back left side of my tongue and 33 lyphnodes in my neck. (yes, it had spread). I was told there was a chance I would never be able to talk again, I might require a feeding tube , maybe a tracheotomy. None of that happened and now lead a perfectly normal life minus spicy food. The radiation was so damaging to my taste buds, neck, etc. It had far worse painful effects than the surgery or the chemo. I had white blisters in my mouth for 6 months, I lost my voice for 2 months. I had to swish some expensive prescription mouthwash just to be able to drink Ensure.
The worst effect of the radiation was necrosis the bone under my back teeth. I went to 35 hyperbaric oxygen treatments in February of 2006. I am very claustrophobic so this was something difficult for me to do. But I went each day and it worked!
As bad as this part of my life was, it taught me to never take my health or any unusual feeling for granted. If I had thought for a moment that I had cancer, I would have gone to the doctor immediately. Pain is a wonderful thing. Without the initial pain from the sore spot on my tongue, I would not have sought help. The cancer would have spread and then it would have been too late.
Never wait, always request that your dentist examine you thoroughly. I had symptoms, but someone else might not.
I am a very fortunate and I hope to stay cancer free for the rest of my life.

GOD IS THE REASON I SURVIVED. NOT ONLY SURVIVED THE DISEASE, BUT ALSO THE ENDLESS DAYS OF PAIN AND WORRY.
HE GAVE ME THE STRENGTH I NEED TO FACE EACH DAY.
THIS EXPERIENCE DREW ME CLOSER TO MY LORD THAN I HAD EVER BEEN!

2008-12-30T20:58:00.009-06:00

Michael and I are blessed to have each other and our 2 sons. Thank you God for letting us share another wonderful Christmas together. May Blake and Bradley always know the true meaning of this season.

My first born son, Blake, is a precious gift from God. He has heart of gold!

Baby Bradley, my Christmas angel. This little face fills my heart with joy!

PREPARING FOR CHRISTMAS 2008

2008-12-03T20:06:00.005-06:00

Putting up the tree this year was different. Usually, I try to decorate when the kids are not home or asleep. But this year, they were so helpful. We put up the tree and hung ornaments together. I guess that means they are growing up. Kind of sad, but it really was special preparing for Christmas with them!

2008-11-15T20:41:00.007-06:00

DADDY....

Wow, my Dad has really been tough. I hope that I'm made out of the same stuff he's made of.

Last Tuesday, he had a total hip replacement. Major surgery, but not so major compared to previous ones.

Sinus surgery, 2 heart bypass surgeries, 1 lung cancer surgery (removed 1/3 of his right lung), 2 hernia repairs, and 1 heart valve replacement surgery. I believe that makes 8 surgeries.

But until his first heart surgery at age 43, he worked almost everyday of his life. (still worked after his surgery too) He was milking cows at age 4! He took after his dad with a love for farming. He raised me and Beth and supported his family on nothing but hard manual farm work. Between acres and acres of tobacco and 365 days/year, twice a day milkings, he still had time to spend with us. My wonderful mother was by his side and worked the same job everyday for 43 years. What wonderful role models we have!

I am very proud of both parents, but I want to take a moment to reflect on how lucky I am to have such a strong, honest, hard-working, loving, generous father. It doesn't have to be Father's Day, Thanksgiving, or any other special day to say "Thank You God for blessing me with my Dad and giving him chance after chance, through rough times, to pull through and still be with us!"

2008-11-08T21:25:00.002-06:00

Bradley says,

"Happy Veterans Day!"

2008-10-31T21:03:00.007-05:00

Batman and Skeleton are ready to scare the town of Henrietta!

Phillip and Corneice were happy to see us.

Uncle Junior and Aunt Nell are always our first stop!

Granddad loves his little monsters.

Grammy has extra special treats for us!!

TALK OF HALLOWEEN AND COSTUME

CHOICE BEGIN IN JULY AT OUR HOUSE.

BLAKE AND BRADLEY LOVE HALLOWEEN

AND MIKE AND I SEE NO HARM IN HAVING

FUN, JUST AS WE DID AS KIDS.

JESUS IS IN THEIR HEARTS AND YOU CAN'T

CONVINCE ME THAT HALLOWEEN WILL

MAKE THEM BAD PEOPLE. LET THEM BE KIDS!!!!

"This is the Day the Lord Has Made"

2008-10-22T22:00:00.004-05:00

Bradley and Blake love to sing while Grammy plays "Jesus songs" on the piano. They decided they would sing at church this past Sunday and at Laity Club Tuesday night. "This is the Day the Lord Has Made" ....and how true that was. I was so proud of them!

FUN AT THE PUMPKING PATCH

2008-10-18T14:49:00.013-05:00

We had so much fun at the pumpkin patch today. The weather was beautiful!!

Mama's Retirement Party

2008-09-28T21:07:00.008-05:00

Last night, we celebrated Mama's retirement by having a family dinner at our house. After 43 years, she was ready to celebrate. I cooked a meal and we had about 25 family members come to wish her well as she is becoming a "lady of leisure". It was a great night!

BUSY WEEK FOR THE BROWNS

2008-09-20T20:09:00.014-05:00

Wow, it has been a fun,busy week. Last Saturday, we celebrated Cousin Caleb's birthday at Lacy Coy park. Everyone loved the playground, pizza and cake. (Mommy enjoyed time with family). The merry-go-round didn't agree with Blake, but it was a great day. Caleb is a special little boy!!

Wednesday we worked on Blake's school project of a landform. We had to take 2 cups of flour, 2 cups of sugar and a little water to form a clay mixture which we shaped to make an island in the middle of the ocean. We baked the clay for 2 hours at 150 degrees. Blake, Bradley and I painted it Thursday.

Thursday was mine and Mike's anniversary. He built me a beautiful porch swing. I love it!

Today, we went to Cousin Ashton's birthday party at the Jump Zone. What a blast!!!
Running, jumping, laughing...then pizza and cake. Now that's a party! Yeah, Ashton!

Mike and I went out to eat tonight at my favorite restaurant, Rafferty's, just the two of us. The boys went to another birthday picnic with Grammy and Granddad for T.J. Mobley. Needless to say, they have now crashed for the night.

Next week should be another busy week for me as I prepare for Mama's retirement party. I have only invited Mom and Dad's immediate family + a few, but there are lots of "immediate family" members. I pray it does not rain, or we will all be cozy in our house.

To be continued....................

Our Anniversary, September 18: Looking Back on the Past 9 Years

2008-09-13T20:19:00.010-05:00

It is hard to believe that Mike and I will celebrate our 9th anniversary on the 18th!
So much has happened in our lives since that Sunday night in November of 1998 when we met for a blind date at Dairy Queen parking lot. (this location was half way between Henrietta and Houston County). Only because a trusted mutual friend said "you've got to meet this great guy" did I agree to it. That night changed my life.
We were engaged 4 months later (in Dairy Queen parking lot). It was very sweet of him, he had planned it all so well. Little did I know that he had asked my dad earlier that week and took Ginger with him to make sure he picked out the perfect ring.
6 month engagement took us to September 18. Since that date we have had quite a roller coaster ride. (ups and downs)

We lived in my apartment in Mom and Dad's basement for almost 2 years. During that time we had a beautiful baby boy...Blake Lenox Brown! He was perfect, except for the fact that he was 5 weeks early and he stopped breathing in the hospital nursery.
This lead to 7 days in intensive care nursery and 4 months on an apnea monitor. A very trying time. He's a very healthy child now. Thank you Lord!

Gallbladder surgery for me in August of that year and started building our house in October. (Mike built our house, which is very special to me). Mike, Blake and I moved in January 2002 just in time to celebrate Blake's first birthday.

Little Bradley Walker Brown came in January of 2003. What a precious baby!
I went through some post partum depression a few months after he was born. (they say that is normal after the second child and it was a very real thing for me).

November of 2004, Mike got sick with a bad cold, which turned into pneumonia and put him in the hospital for a week. If you know my husband, this is major. He is never sick and he is a workaholic. (I always prayed for a hard working man and the Lord blessed me with one). Of course, he fully recovered, but during his hospital stay I was having some discomfort of my own. I had and ulcer on the side of my tongue that was really annoying. I tried everything but it would not go away. After several months of home remedies and doctor visits, I found out what my problem was. March 10, 2005 was the day that changed my life in a way that words can't explain. I found out that I had tongue cancer.
(someday I will write about my cancer story, but I'm not ready to relive it yet).

Needless to say, a major 5 hour surgery with radiation and chemo to follow. A long, long, weary road to recovery.
Not an easy time for our family but Mike was wonderful. He was there for me every step of the way, encouraging me and telling me that "you can and will beat this".
My children were 2 and 4 years old. I could cry right now to think that they might have lost their Mommy at that age.
But, on a happy note, I am doing great and I feel healthier than ever. (doctors have confirmed that I am fine).

So, with our 9 year anniversary approaching next week, I its good to remember the major events of our life together.
I am so thankful that God has put Mike in my life, blessed us with Blake and Bradley, and that He has delivered us from painful experiences.

Mike and I have been there for each other "for better and for worse, for richer and for poorer, in sickness and in health". Lets pray for more "healthier, better and richer" in the future! (in that order)

May we have many more years together!!!

Beth and Sean

2008-09-08T21:40:00.007-05:00

Beth and I don't see each other (though we are next door neighbors) as much as we should but we have a special bond. Our lives seem to go in two different directions. She's always a phone call away.
I am proud to call Beth my sister.

MAMA...MY BEST FRIEND

2008-09-08T21:38:00.006-05:00

Mama is the simply the best!

FUN WITH GRANDDAD

2008-09-08T21:33:00.007-05:00

Granddad loves to have fun with the boys.
His grandkids try to keep him young!

MY GUYS

2008-09-08T21:21:00.007-05:00

Here are my guys, the loves of my life.
Michael, Blake and Bradley keep me busy, but I wouldn't have it any other way. Everyday is an adventure and I am so thankful for these 3 wonderful gifts God has given me.

Mommy's Kindergarten Blues

2008-08-17T18:59:00.002-05:00

It has been harder than I thought seeing my baby Bradley start Kindergarten. I know it was hard when Blake started school, but for some reason, this is different. Bradley is still my baby in so many ways. It helps that he is happy about going to school and that I love East Montgomery. Ms. Osborne seems nice, looking forward to talking to her more after his testing.

Blake likes 2nd grade, actually, it is safe to say that he loves school. This is such a blessing to me, though I know his feelings will probably change in a few years.

I know they tell me that these are the easy years, I should savor all of these "firsts" and special moments. I just pray that God guides them and protects them daily when I can't be with them, and even when I am. They (and Mike) are my life and I want to be the best mommy that I can.
Sometimes I just feel so torn between work and family.......Lord, help me stay BALANCED!
Balance is a struggle for me sometimes. I have to focus on the important parts of my life and not be so obsessed with the small stuff.

Today in sunday school, we discussed making time for church besides just Sunday morning worship. Making time to be more active and participate in all aspects of our church. I need to do this for God, for my church, for me and especially set a good example for my boys.
Someday they may lose interest in church, just as many people do. I just hope that I raise them so that they know deep inside that they can always come back to the church family even if they stray. "Raise up a child in the way he should go and he will never depart from it" (or something like that).